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  • Writer's pictureJamie Bates

Give Up The Defense And Conquer Your World

Updated: Sep 5, 2022

How much of your day do you find you defending your actions?

Do you continually feel like you are fighting with those around you? Do you find yourself auto responding with no's before you have even given yourself a moment to process what someone said?

Do you feel bad about yourself because you did things you shouldn't have done or said things you shouldn't have said?

If these above are true for you, you may be stuck in the paradigms of defense.

Defense is a sticky energetic system. It's really a place within the energy, space, and consciousness of you that you go that keeps you from choosing something different.

It keeps you looping in fighting for or against something constantly.

How do I know if I am stuck in defense?

You may auto-respond with no about everything.

It's like someone asks you something and before you can even process it you are immediately saying no. That is usually followed up by feeling bad you said no but not even being able to say anything different.

You may not be able to admit that you are wrong.

Even when the evidence is there proving you were, you may still fight that you were right.

You often automatically argue about everything.

You will find yourself in an argument about the littlest things, even things that don't matter.

You have a hard time apologizing.

It may feel very difficult to say that you are sorry even when you want to.

You have a hard time listening and being present with other people's points of view.

You feel like you always have something to say about everything and you always have to say it. Like you literally can't just let someone say something, especially if you feel like it's wrong.

You have a hard time keeping your mouth shut.

Even though you promised yourself when you left the house tonight that you were going to keep your mouth shut you just couldn't. And you said something utterly ridiculous again. And you hate yourself for it.

And your legit tired of being this way. It sucks.

And you're exhausted from the fight against everyone and everything.

Here's how I overcame the system of defense:

1. I did some deep energetic clearings to remove the form and structure around defense. Afterall defense is an energetic structure within the matrix. When you remove it from your field you can replace it with form and structure that works better.

2. After I released it I had to teach myself how to respond differently. If I messed up, I apologized immediately or as soon as I could, even if it was weeks later.

3. I forgave myself. I stopped making myself wrong for all the times I was defensive. And if I did it again, I apologized and I let myself off the hook.

4. I surrender to all the past situations I made bad choices because of my defense. Then I did lots of energy pulls of all the situations.

5. I took personal responsibility for my life and my actions. I understood that I create my life and no one is to blame.

6. I took a pledge of silence. I made a conscious choice to listen and feel the energy before responding.

7. I practiced being more present in my life. I understood that being present gave me way more space to be me. And when I was me it was easy to not be defending my actions or anyone else's.

About the author

Jamie Bates is a consciousness facilitator, author, podcast host, wife, mother, empath, and energy healer. Jamie's podcast, Expand Your Reality offers a wide variety of tools and healing processes that are also found in her many workshops and online programs. Check them all out at


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